I was inspired this morning and so here is my report of camp in the form of multiple Haikus in chronological order. Enjoy.
"I forgot my shirt"
Turn around and go back home.
Lily starts to scream.
Sunshine on the lake.
Megaboggan pulled by Steve.
Praying for strong ice.
Steep and muddy slope.
Why did I take the short cut?
Try not to squash Lil.
Co-ordinator?
Some instructions would be good.
Spring camp? Likely not.
Asparagus soup.
Salmon sauce and moist pork loin.
Coffee dark and full.
These children are mine.
I know how to parent them.
Back off crazy broad.
Sleeping baby girl.
In bed, arms, and cuddly wrap.
Who needs a play pen?
Go home little kids.
Where in the hell is Wally?
Camp might never end.
Grumpy babe and boy.
Screams in the car and at home.
Sleep will fix it all.
Hello world!
1 year ago
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8 comments:
I am begging you to expand on the "crazy broad" post. Sounds like a great rant.
And you thought the broad was cool....
BTW, we got great reviews about camp. From parents and kids - you guys did just fine.
Dylan: Crazy broad continually interrupted me when I was telling Nicholas what to do, told him what to eat, and even spoon-fed him his breakfast on the last day. With Lillian, she started off by taking her out of my arms repeatedly and putting her fingers in Lily's mouth. Also, when I did a presentation for the Cubs, Lillian started crying and I asked that she be brought to Liam. Crazy broad stole my crying baby out of Liam's arms and took off across the building with her. She also pissed me off by sitting on her behind and reading a book while the rest of us srubbed the lodge from top to botton just before we left.
Krista: I never thought she was cool. My first meeting with her was brief enough that I thought she was normal. The weekend definitely proved you and Liam correct, though. Oh, and with the camp co-ordinator thing, I'm not so much worried that I did a poor job as I am ticked off with the way a number of things were handled. It ended the weekend on a very sour note for me and I don't know if I want to do it again in the spring.
Crazy Broad's kids were just as bad as Crazy Broad was too. One of them came out into the common area and gave the grownups crap for talking, and she was just plain creepy.
I was pulling Beavers along the ice on a GT snow-racer, because the Cubs were off on the Mega-boggan and the Beavers were beginning to get bored. I'd drag them over snow-mounds fast enough so they'd get a little air.
I was going to take a Beaver out and this kid said "Okay, but that's the last time" in a chiding voice as if I was doing something wrong. I had a couple things to say to him but I kept my mouth shut.
Freaks.
She chastised me for getting Syd speech therapy - a conversation she was not part of, but butted into anyway. Thankfully, this will be her last year.
Wow.
That bitch is whack.
(crazy broad, that is)
That bitch needs to BE whacked.
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