23 January 2007

So red bell peppers and thumbs are completely different things. My knife and I learned this lesson together tonight.

In the last step of my mad-dash supper creation, I mis-judged the distance from the knife to my thumb and chopped myself instead of the pesky red pepper. I gave Liam the job of inspecting my thumb because I was too scared of what I'd see. His professional prognosis was "It's pretty bad" and he gave me a tissue to sop up the blood.

Ten minutes later, I pulled the tissue off only to have blood start oozing out at an alarming rate. On went a wad of toilet paper. As an aside, toilet paper is a BAD choice for dressing a wound. Fifteen minutes later when I removed the toilet paper I found that it was stuck and I accidentally opened the cut up a bit more. And I bled more. Of course.

At this point, Liam picked up the Lil and announced that he was taking me in to the ER for stitches. I managed to hold him off by phoning the Health Link to ask what the criterea is for getting stitches. By the time I got off the phone, the bleeding had stopped, the throbbing had mostly subsided, and I was fairly confident that I could forgo the two hours of waiting to see a doctor at the Medicentre. I contemplated following the Health Link nurse's advice to go in for a tetanus shot, but between Liam, my Dad, and I we figured that my clean and shiny knife posed little threat.

My lesson for the night is: chop more slowly, watch more closely. In the end, at least I didn't mess myself up as badly as Liam did. I'd be miffed if I lost the ability to make fun of his knife handling skills.

And on that note, off I go to watch TV. Liam has just put "Snakes on a Plane" on. I'm not sure if I'm excited or scared...


El Cliff said...

Wow. So, in...say...25 years, do we have any predictions of how Lillian will slice herself with a kitchen knife? Aaaah, genetics.

domesticvixen said...

I think Lily should be outfitted with metal mesh gloves now, just to be save.

KimProbable said...

An update:

Snakes on a plane....ouch. I want my two hours back and the image of a guy with a high heel stuck in his ear out of my head.

As for my thumb, I'm starting to think I should have actually gone in for stitches. It's deeper than I thought and although nothing could have been done about the part where I cut through my nail, at least the skin wouldn't be gaping so much right now. Ugh.

El Cliff said...

Come on, how about rhe fat lady takin' a snakebite in the eye? THAT was a visual for the ages!

I think you're like me when it comes to cuts. Sometimes, you SHOULD have had stitches, but you just don't think about it at the time. Slap on a Band-Aid, and it's outta sight, outta mind.

KimProbable said...

I think the fat lady scene was tied with the nipple snake and the dick snake ("#%$$% snake, get off my dick!!"). It was all just so bad. And so gross.

I think at the moment I'm less concerned about the lack of stitching and more concerned with my repeated bumping of my thumb. I've even got it all bandaged up with layers of gauze and tape but I just keep smashing it into things. Stupid thumb.

El Cliff said...

I feel your pain. Or, at least, I did when my finger was healing after a mashed it between a couple of 100+ pound drillpipe elevators a few months back. Woo! the fun. I kept smacking my finger in to everything...probably because I had to wear a brace on it for two frigging weeks. Maddening. After about 10 days, for some reason, I developed an uncontrollable urge to just bend my knuckles whenever I put it on. Drove me mad.

Liam J. said...

It was probably less a matter of you starting to hit it on everything and more a matter of noticing when it hit stuff. Pain sucks.

El Cliff said...

It does indeed. I think it was a combo of the two. I don't normally whack a finger on much, but slap a brace and a bunch of med-tape on that, NOW it's big enough to hit shit!

On the good side, several MONTHS later, the new nail is finally growing in.

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